I used to have a penchant for sifting through the obligatory 25-cent bin at just about every comic shop I could find. I wasn’t seeking lost, valuable treasures as much as I was seeking out a great story or inspiring artwork. Anyone hoping to stumble into a comic shop and walk out with an unrealized treasure is in for a sad realization, because they just don’t work that way. I’ve always leaned towards the eclectic, so someone else’s junk comic may just be an ideal find for me.

Usually, the comics just plain old sucked – but it’s hard to go wrong for a quarter. There’s a level of suck that can be reached that cyclically runs back around into the scope of ‘unintentionally awesome’.

Back in college, I picked up a few stray issues of The Puma Blues that I found in one such bin. After reading a whole lot of Sandman in high school, I became a fan of Michael Zulli’s artwork, so I was excited to find a whole comic series illustrated by him. While I couldn’t make much sense of the story, due in equal parts to missing issues and a storyline that was thick with dreamlike weirdness and shifting through time, it was only recently that I realized the significance of this series in the larger world of comic books and how they are distributed.

It all comes back to Cerebus’ creator Dave Sim, the Angry Man of Comics. The Deranged, Frothy Man of Comics. The Misogynistic, Unapologetic Man of Comics. Either way, he’s notoriously controversial and he takes comics very seriously, love him or hate him. It’s this seriousness, overblown or not, which changed the face of comics and how we collect them.

Initially published under Sim’s ‘Aardvark One International’ imprint, The Puma Blues moved to Mirage Comics after ‘The Puma Blues Distribution Incident’ of 1987. Sim’s own Cerebus comic was a very popular title at the time, so when Sim decided to not use Diamond Comics Distribution Services to distribute a Cerebus graphic novel, Diamond retaliated by arbitrarily deciding to also not carry The Puma Blues anymore. Because Diamond is now, and has always been, an almost monopolistic force when it comes to comic distribution to your neighborhood comic shop, this was a noticeable blow to both parties.

This battle led directly to Sim orchestrating a series of meetings to establish The Creators Bill Of Rights, which was established in 1988 by a handful of prominent independent comic book writers and artists. While this hasn’t completely stopped Diamond Comics from butting heads with small creators and shops, it marked an important landmark in the treatment of comics as a valid creative medium. The establishment of these ideas were instrumental in the formation of Image Comics in 1992, when many creators walked away from mainstream publishers Marvel and DC Comics and their questionable contracts to focus on original creations. Image has since established itself as the fourth largest comic book publisher in the United States, which is impressive when you consider that they’ve been around for only a fraction of the time that Marvel and DC have existed.

So, The Puma Blues is the little comic that changed the way that we collect today. And I found it in the back of my closet.

I’ve spoken about it here before, but it needs to be said again.

Over the past week, the mighty internet has bludgeoned me with two completely different examples of how collectors are occasionally perceived – and it was not pretty.

In the initial instance that I came across, someone had dug up an old Gizmodo article from 2008 which interviewed a dedicated Star Wars action figure collector, and reposted the accompanying images on their blog. This, of course, was followed by the obligatory comment that follows anything about a Star Wars fan that’s ever been posted on the internet :

“He needs to get out of his mother’s basement! It’s sad that he’ll never get a girlfriend!”

Now, I’m not going to speak for the entire geek populace here, because I’ve honestly never been in another room that’s had a proud display of Star Wars action figures, but when is this weird stereotype going to die? And what keeps on perpetuating it?

I admit it : when the Original Trilogy was a big deal a few years ago, I went a little crazy over the vintage-style Star Wars figures of the essential characters. I bought many of them, and I still have them tacked safely to my walls. At this point, they’re likely destined for eBay, but let me say this : these action figures have seen more action than you could possibly imagine. And yes, it involved women. Live ones. I feel that I needed to qualify that statement.

In fact, my last, very hot girlfriend requested that I keep all of my Star Trek action figures so that we could display them around the apartment. While the apartment didn’t work out, nor did her ability to keep her pants on among random strangers, it served as fairly concrete proof that it’s totally okay to be yourself. There’s going to be someone out there who embraces the same passions as you, or at the very least, embraces your passion. It’s simply wrong, and more than a little sexist, to assume that there are no chicks cool enough to embrace what you love, even if it is vinyl caped Jawas.

Sure, there’s a point of obsession where real life and responsibility becomes occluded, but collecting is usually a sign of prosperity. One simply doesn’t spend money on collecting things if food and shelter are an issue, unless there’s a much larger problem of mental illness. That’s another discussion entirely, but to assume that anyone who collects slightly geeks paraphernalia lives in a basement as a virgin is a frustrating stereotype to battle.

My love of Star Wars led directly to a job illustrating Star Wars cards for Topps. Have you done anything that awesome?

The second instance was an image posted on FailBlog, in which a kid was laying in a room full of Pokemon stuff. Being from FailBlog, the image was emblazoned with the word ‘FAIL’, though I can’t seem to make the connection between a kid collecting something that he loves and the idea of ‘failure’. Since when are we a culture to insult and deride children for what they’re passionate about?

Everything that we learn and everything that we love are tools to be used towards something greater. An acquaintance recently related the story of her daughter who was very much into Pokemon, back around when the whole US fascination with the series began. Her Pokemon cards turned into an interest in Japanese culture, which evolved into an interest in the Japanese language, which soon turned into an invitation from Japan to come and teach English to elementary school students – at the age of 14.

While not every collector will turn their interests into something productive or positive, a vast majority of us possess a deep, intellectual curiosity about the things we love, and how they connect to the rest of the world.

And that’s not something to be laughed at.

As collectors, we’ll often have the need to sell stuff just to make room for even better stuff. It’s just a fact of acquisition.

After an especially troublesome incident last year in which a $500 item arrived broken in Germany, and my PayPal account was decimated by an overzealous and anxious collector, I vowed to never, ever sell overseas again. In fact, I spent half a year just avoiding eBay entirely after that, as if I were deeply, emotionally wounded. eBay had crippled themselves by changing too many rules too rapidly, and I always came out on the short end of the deal when it came to dealing with entitled buyers overseas. I understand that there is tension when there is money at stake, but my enormous feedback rating should be more than enough to quell any suspicions of my intent. I just want to sell crap to make room for more robots and Batman, guys.

I began to include a statement in all of my auctions which states that I do not ship internationally. Certain countries don’t have postal services that can be relied on, and I am unwilling to take the financial brunt of this ineptitude. Of course, I get questions during just about every auction I list asking if I’ll ship to Bulgravia or to New Porkinghamshire, and like a fool, I usually say yes. At best, I’ll attract one extra bidder to amp up the final price of my item a little more, and at worst, I’ll have to fill out complicated customs forms and swallow a whole lot of annoyance from a system that’s practically broken when it comes to protecting the seller against international fraud – and there’s a lot of it. Somewhere over the vast ocean between here and everywhere else is this force that just screws everything up.

The most telling trait of a person who will be an issue is that they will send multiple e-mails in rapid succession, all asking tiny questions about issues that the auction’s description has already answered, or if the item is really, truly as you described it. Really? There’s no dust? Has it ever been near someone named Lloyd? I’m sure you kicked it after you took that photograph, so don’t lie to me. It’s these neuroses that bleed into just about everything they do. During my most recent encounter, I sold a $100 set of action figures to a guy in China with a penchant for asking lots of stupid questions.

After the auction closed, he gave me his address – but completely in Chinese characters. Of course, these are useless when filling out the extensive US customs form, and the package would never make it out of the states in one piece. So, I asked for his address in English.

Because of a language barrier, the buyer transposed the number of his building with the number of his room. So, three weeks later, when the package did not arrive, I tracked it to find that his local post had attempted to deliver it to a building that did not exist, based on the instructions that he gave me. This is when he suddenly started a PayPal claim against me. For shipping to an incorrect address. That he gave me.

Anyone who has been through one of these ‘claims’ knows that they are a complete pain. PayPal immediately puts the disputed amount of money ‘on hold’, and drains it from your account. If you do not have enough money, they leave you with a negative balance. This also means that if you intend on purchasing anything via PayPal, you will need to pay for the item in full, plus your negative balance if you want a transaction to go through at all. And, of course, in a fashion that matches the type of luck that I have, this all arose only moments before a very important, limited pre-order went up which I had been awaiting for two weeks, and could only be purchased via PayPal.

It is worth noting that the Post Office is currently trying to digitize as much of the mailing process as they possibly can, and all customs forms should now be filled out online. This avoids a good deal of hassle and the possible ambiguity of information, but the USPS website is also broken about half of the time which I attempt to use it, with sections randomly just not working, and at least a dozen times when my zip code spontaneously vanished from this mortal plane. My town might feel like that, and now I had proof. It was during one of these frequent and mysterious outages that this package needed to be sent, which did not help any. And don’t try clicking on ‘Live Chat Help’ at the USPS website either – it’s basically a non-functional image that leads nowhere. Very funny, Post Office.

While I’m not saying that you should never ship anything internationally, be careful of those people who ask a ton of questions, and if you have any doubt, just say no. Once your collectibles leave the relatively regimented US Postal Service, there is no guarantee for their safety.

After all of this, the buyer continued to ask questions about resolving the issue of the missing items, which he still wants, and are now being sent back to me, apparently. My answer?

“You stated a PayPal claim. Let them deal with it, moron.”

I’ve never been a fan of Mickey Mouse. I’ve actually never felt too much of an affinity for any Disney character, aside from a deep sympathy for Donald Duck’s impossible bad luck. Disney, like Star Wars, has always been very protective over their properties and usually unwilling to allow any kind of non-canonical interpretations of their characters. However, also like Star Wars, Disney has recently relented in the unstoppable face of the DIY movement and allowed a variety of interesting interpretations of their most famous property.

I first started noticing these interpretations with this ‘Runaway Brain’ Mickey Mouse, which was probably the first time that I’d seen Mickey portrayed in a manner that wasn’t pristine and heroic, and ultimately, saccharine. I liked it, even if it is canonical and fits into an actual cartoon.

Of course there are the obligatory Mickey Mouse statues that dress him up as alternate Disney characters, like TRON, Jack Sparrow or Jack Skellington – a whole bunch of Disney things that ultimately feed right back into the juggernaut of the Disney machine – but Disney has started to stretch their horizons beyond obvious interpretations.

Most notable for me is this ‘Bloc 28 Mickey’ from Suiko and MINDStyle Toys, which is a fairly radical and incredible re-imagining of the Mickey character. Because he’s so culturally iconic, he only requires minimal key visual elements in any image to reflect the fact that you’re looking at Mickey Mouse. In this case, the artist has completely done away with the bulbous pair of ears and the distinctive pants and buttons – but the color recognizability is still there. That’s a testament to the power of an icon. This particular piece is limited to 500 pieces and costs $125, standing at a full foot tall.

Even more bizarre is this piece by MINDStyle and Tenga, which only retains the signature spherical pants and the recognizable buttons, but includes some completely non-Mickey wings, blue gloves, and general surrealist weirdness. Disney is still comfortable calling it ‘Mickey’, so kudos to Disney for embracing the piece. They did, after all, work with Salvador Dali once.

Also released is this Span Of Sunset and Bloc 28 piece, which realizes Mickey as some kind of vector-y, angular creature that fell out of a Max Headroom nightmare.

There’s also this unlikely Mickey Mouse / Transformers crossover from Tomy, for what it’s worth.

A little over a year ago, designers BAPE released this $223 designer Minnie doll, which is apparently very special due to the fact that it is made in a grey camo pattern. While some designer stuff just seems like cheap regurgitation of a simplistic, artificial theme to me, I still love that distorted, twisted up Mickey from Suiko.

While this is by no means a comprehensive list of the strange Mickeys that are now, and will be, available, it’s a fairly awesome bridge between ‘art’ and the world of Disney, which is working hard to shed its pristine, kid-centric image – enough to get me interested.

So, I’ve catalogued the many reasons that I respect Nintendo’s whole Punch-Out!! franchise, but the entire cause of this resurgence of interest rests on the fact that the newest Wii version of the game is one of the greatest things to ever happen to humanity. Polio vaccine? You have nothing on punching cartoon characters.

Nintendo has completely made good on its promise to get people off of the couch and into a truly interactive gaming experience with many different games. While Wii Fit was a program that got me moving and exercising for a little while, the appeal of the super-cute little ‘Mii’ version of myself that the game uses to personalize the experience just wasn’t cutting it for me. It’s hard to take something seriously when the figure representing you has a head about the same size as its body. After a few weeks, my interest trailed off and the Wii balance board started to collect dust.

So, while Punch-Out!! doesn’t offer a full-body, moderated workout, it absolutely got me motivated to move. The lifestyle of an artist and writer is a relatively sedentary one, and when you combine that with a year full of illness and injury, you have one chubby little nerd. The most important step in weight loss is getting started at all, and I’ve finally found myself doing something more active than I have for a full year. I consider that a victory.

In Punch-Out!!, you play a diminutive boxer named Little Mac, and predictably, you aspire to move up through the ranks and become the world champion at punching things. Using the Wii remote in one hand and the Wii nunchuk attachment in the other, you punch, duck, dodge and block your way through the complex patterns of attacks that your immense opponents throw at you. It’s not ridiculously difficult, but reaction time and poise are just as important at the ability to throw a quick jab, all culminating in a very artful experience that transcends he implied brutality of what you’d expect from video game boxing.

While you can play the game with a standard controller and not move at all aside from your thumbs, purists will play Punch-Out!! standing up with arms flailing. A certain veracity sets in when you realize that you simply cannot defeat an opponent because you’re just too tired and your reaction time has been physically diminished by your actual motion. After my first day of playing this, my arms were very sore and I was sweating. After the third and fourth days, I found that my abdominal muscles were sore, as well as my upper thighs. The motions required by gameplay do indeed force you to use these muscles to throw accurate punches. It’s the kind of soreness that results from actually doing exercise. While I’m not here to imply that Punch-Out!! is a cure-all for obesity, it’s one critical, initial step towards me finding my health again. Is it the fact that if you punch the French guy hard enough, croissants will fly out of his head? Maybe.

The intuitive gameplay is something that just about anyone should be capable of mastering, as it rarely goes beyond hitting the ‘duck’ button at the right moment or punching with the arm that will do the most damage at any given point. Your ducking, blocking, dodging and headshots are all determined by the directional stick on the Wii nunchuk controller, unlike the controls for Wii Boxing in which these motions are all controlled without the involvement of any buttons at all. While I would have liked to see these kinds of complex body controls with Punch-Out!!, one does have the option of hooking up the Wii balance board to control some of these movements, though reaction time tends to be diminished.

The graphics are crisp, the animations and characters are genuinely funny, and as you fight your way through all of the challengers a second time to retain your title, you almost feel bad for them. Sure, they become insanely difficult, but there’s so much personality there that it’s hard not to.

I don’t know if Nintendo has ever disappointed with one of their native franchise titles, and this is no exception. There are lots of Wii games that are worth collecting, but this is in the top ten that I now consider essential.