Tag Sale Finds : Sounds of Terror LP

I’ve always hated Monster Mash. I’m not entirely sure why, because I certainly love Halloween and just about everything that it entails, from the ghostly imagery to the conservative groups coming out of the woodwork to denounce kids dressing up as the undead or the demonic. So, it was out of pure optimism that I picked up the ‘Monster Mash / Sounds of Terror’ LP at the same junk sale I found my Armand Schaubroeck LP. I always go for the oddballs.

We didn’t have any Halloween music around when I was a kid, and since this was published in 1974, well before my birth, this wasn’t a staple as it was for so many. I had some remote hopes for short, tremendously bad holiday-themed songs, but the whole album happens to be more of a sound effects record – which is even better.

Each of the nineteen two-minute scenarios is introduced by a narrator (usually affecting one accent or another badly), who then fades away to allow a collection of atmospheric sounds to take over – usually cackling, screaming, dragging things, each set very specific to the scene being laid out. A foghorn can be heard quietly in the background while Jack the Ripper’s knife repeatedly, and audibly, sinks into a silent corpse and policemen run to the scene. Someone weeps in an echoing chamber as dirt showers down on their coffin and their heartbeat fills their ears as they try to claw their way out of certain death.

It’s really, really dark stuff. I’m inclined to wonder how badly this screwed some kids up. I fully expect to have some really horrible dreams tonight. Worse than that one where I find a live, baby deer in the oven.

You can also fall asleep to the gentle sounds of ‘Burned at the Stake’, ‘The Incredible Giant Crab’ and someone getting ‘Keel-Hauled’. Oh, and a priest getting chucked out of a window by a possessed girl.

This is just one of at least a hundred or so Halloween albums from a similar era, many of which have found their way online by those fans more dedicated to Halloween (and LPs) than myself, though this one is regarded as a bit extreme. While some copies of this album have been listed on eBay for upwards of $150, opened copies in great condition can generally be found for around $10 or less. You can also find copies of this on CD, but they’re definitely not official releases and will suffer from that good ol’ crackle and pop of the turntable needle, as they’re only transfers.

I didn’t pick this up hoping to cash in – just to find an eclectic thing for my LP collection, and I think I scored.